This speaks to me. Especially as I get older.

In my 20s and even early 30s, I was discontent with the person I perceived myself to be. Even more, I had a fear of being alone and, as a result, made poor relationship decisions with both friends and “more than friends.”

Case and point, as a teacher with nine or ten weeks off in the summer I really wanted to plan and execute these huge camping and hiking trips, but usually nobody could or would join me (they either couldn’t get the time off work or they demanded more than one shower per week… so needy). Since I had nobody to accompany me, I didn’t do it; I honestly couldn’t bear being alone that long. Too much me.

As I’ve gotten older, I have become much more at east and content with who I am and I now know how to enjoy my own company, in a healthy way. I’m proud to say that over the last few years I’ve gone on many solo outings when a companion was unavailable.

The bottom line is that earlier in my life, in many ways, I was an unhealthy INFJ. I didn’t recognize who I was and thus couldn’t embrace the fullness and beauty of being an INFJ. The more I’ve learned about myself, the more I have allowed myself to explore what it means to be me. And I like it!

I’ve been much happier recently just doing my own thing. I work to maintain the quality friendships that I have in my life, but I no longer force it; it’s much more organic and healthy. 🥦

If people want to join me, they do; if they can’t or don’t want to, I don’t let it stop me. For other INFJs out there, you do you! There is so much awesome in what you have to offer. Get to know yourself and don’t let others dictate your lifestyle and make demands on your time and energy, which are both quite precious!